Dwarves Radio Talk #13: Overcome the nightmare, stress!

Why we feel stressed? And How to deal with it?

We have just conducted a deep discussion about stress. If you're suffering from the same situation, listen to our sharing. Why we feel stressed? and How to deal with it?

Take away:

  • Failing expectations and comparing ourselves to other people cause stress.
  • There aren't fix ways to deal with stress for everyone.
  • Cut off time on social media + break the key objective into small goals.
  • Answer the question: Do you really need recognition from others?

Minh Truong: Regarding working, stress usually comes to me due to deadlines and workload. I set beyond the standard that I am under pressure. I feel that I can't meet my expectation; I can't be the version that I desire in the time-set. You know, feel like a Loser.

Gradually I think of playing a game: balancing - balance scope of work, output, and timeline. Sometimes, we have to admit our limitations. "I just could do that! I failed my expectation!" Well, it means nothing. Let's treat ourselves easily. Don't meet the deadline? Planning carefully in the next scope!

Khai: Yeah, we simply get stressed because of failing our expectations with our body, personal finance, personal standard, etc. We compare with other people and self-torment. That's the point: Expectation <> Reality. I think it's the origin of stress. On the contrary, we feel happy when getting some achievements, and we're satisfied with ourselves.

We give someone bits of advice like, "Just lower your expectation, man / So don't do that!" But easily said than done! Each person has their own way of dealing with stress. For me, I did nothing! I quit, just went to the hill, literally lied on the bed until I felt better. Some people prefer doing exercises, talking with others or staying alone. Again, there isn't the best way for all of us. You have to find it yourself.

Khanh: Listen to other people's experiences can be a good idea when you're dealing with stress. I am still struggling to find my way, and it is affecting every aspect of my life: career, family, relationships, etc.

Bien: I rarely go anywhere when I am under pressure. I just sit here, in front of the desk, trying to complete what needs to be done.

Khai: Going far away from home, it's like escaping reality. Our mentality is usually afraid to face the problem. We run and hide as long as we can. I think it's not a good way. Problems still stay there, waiting for us. We can't run the entire life. Someday, we have to cope with them and step into the following chapters.

Then, I realize I should break things into small pieces and complete them - one by one. Or move to the things I can do without much struggling. At least we are more confident when getting achievements. If you're living with family, get a small relax by having dinner with them.

Minh Tran: We all have stress in our life, I think so. We go to work, we get married, we have children, we want to make more money, etc. It's because we have life's goals. If we don't have any purpose, just drop what makes us depressed. Easy games! But like people said: no mud, no lotus. Let think stress is just one kind of challenge to overcome when trying to reach the target.

I wonder that "Is social media making us depressed and anxious?" I see everyone is wealthy, happy, and successful. They show up with lots of accomplishments. I compare myself to them and think of a loser. That's peer pressure! So how to control that situation?

Simply cut down the time in surfing social media. Facebook, for example. Focusing ourselves on the set goals. Then, completing small tasks every day can be our happiness. If you follow people's standards, you will be lost all the time.

In our woodland, we have a check-in question every day: What did you work on today?

And a Changelog at the end of the week. When reviewing them, we feel a little satisfied that we are doing something to commit the big target ahead.

Try it, may you feel better!

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